Wednesday, July 23, 2014

1984 Meets LOTR, Последний кольценосец

     Has anyone ever read a totalitarian fantasy novel? I can't help but think that might be an incredibly interesting premise for a story, something along the lines of 1984 or Brave New World, but with illithids disguised as Elves ruling over mankind or something. There are hints of totalitarianism in much of fantasy literature, but they are only used to make the bad guys seem more evil with the THREAT of totalitarianism, but like Voldemort, Sauron, they always fail. Also, themes of dictatorship are sprinkled throughout fantasy literature, like Thranduil in 'The Hobbit 2.'

But it's okay because he's pretty.

     The only out and out 'Totalitarian Fantasy' novel I can think of is 'The Last Ringbearer,' a novel that has had trouble getting published in English-speaking countries because it is an unapologetic rip-off of LOTR. The short of it, is that the novel, originally written in Russia as Последний кольценосец, retells the story of LOTR except that Morder is a peaceful Eastern civilization while the Western nations of Gondor and Rohan are war-mongering empires. It might be more interesting if it weren't so depressing and also such a flagrant and heavy-handed attack on the West by a Russian/pro-orc author.

     Totalitarian stories are so common in sci-fi, but practically non-existent in fantasy. Perhaps because people buy fantasy looking for what they wish the world was, while people buy sci-fi novels to read about their worst fears of our world coming true.

Tuesday, July 22, 2014

BTW I'm not dead.

     Contrary to what you may think, I am not dead! And neither was this blog! I have just been busy laboring, sending out my manuscript to literary agents, writing new short stories and sending them out to other people. I am going to keep writing and updating this blog with thoughts on the literary scene and hopefully I'll have some of my stories to publish, which will be linked. I will not be updating daily, but trust me, I have many a thought to pour out onto the world about story-crafting, and I shall!

Predicting the Future: Duct Tape

     Occasionally I write sci-fi stories and one of the hardest parts of writing sci-fi is: how will the future change and what technologies will be invented/come to prevalence? Writing sci-fi that takes place 1 or 2 years in the future is easy, because you can say that all current day technology is the same except the technology that's relevant to your story. The farther you move in time, the harder it gets, until you reach the hundred year mark and you basically have to play the role of a witch doctor in your predictions.

     There is a cheat though; I've found that in the history of humanity, every time there is a genuine problem there will always be a duct tape solution. Let's look at the history of medicine for example: every time there has been a major epidemic science has managed to come up with a treatment and, rarely, a cure, as int he cases of polio and smallpox. But more often than not, killers like AIDS, cancer, diabetes are researched until they have a workable treatment rather than an actual cure. Conspiracy theorists claim it's because doctors and hospitals want to make money off of expensive treatments rather than curing a disease. But there are two damning flaws to this conspiracy theory: (1) every doctor and researcher on the planet wants to be known as the person who found the cure to a major disease, so there is no way that if a cure is found it will stay hidden. (2) The conspiracy theory that cures are hidden to make people take expensive treatments relies on the logical fallacy that pharma companies need a logical excuse to charge people ridiculous prices. They don't, they raise prices all the time for no better reason other than people can't fight them.

     The truth about why we don't have a cure for AIDS or cancer is simply: it's hard. And once you reach the duct tape solution the incentive to cure a disease with a workable treatment falls off the map. Example: When AIDs was a huge epidemic and anyone who contracted it had a very short amount of time to live, there were companies and organizations working around the clock to cure AIDS. They did a tremendous amount of good and now a person with AIDS can live for 20 years if they take care of themselves. While AIDS as a killer in the United States has rapidly declined, cancer is the biggest killer and depending on which cancer you are diagnosed with the survival period is relatively small. As such, the largest amount of funding dollars, media coverage and research is towards cancer research.

     And this is how technology works: as long as you can find a solution that works relatively well, chances are things won't change. That's why doctors and lots of older professionals in Japan still use pagers instead of holograms. It's why subway systems and cars haven't all been replaced by tubes. And why duct tape will still be used for the next hundred years of human history. Yes, that is my prediction. Duct tape will be used for the next century. Why? Because duct tape is the single best 'Plan B' there is.

The perfection of technology.

     Whenever people need to actually weld something together, there are Plan As, but as far as Plan Bs duct tape is so reliable that astronauts have been using it for forty years.

Apollo 17's wheel. Because NASA is professional.

     I'm sure someone could come up with a better product than duct tape, but there doesn't seem to be any demand. There are already better solutions to duct tape, but all those are Plan As; costlier and more permanent. If a director needs to attach a camera to a dummy for multiple runs up a roller coaster they can make a mini-crane to hold it in place. But if they just need one shot they will duct tape a roller coaster or a snowboard, or someone's helmet.

     Because of the sci-fi law of Duct Tape Solutions, I'd say duct tape will be around for another hundred years. Though I'm not sure what kind of sci-fi story you could write about it...

Wednesday, July 16, 2014

New Landscapes

Canada is pretty idyllic. At least, Ontario with its thousands of lakes and western Alberta and British Columbia with their mountains. Everything in between was flat cornfields and tiny towns that never took off.





Despite this, I think I need to visit a part of the world that isn't North America or Europe. The landscape in Canada is so similar to Germany, England and Oregon. I think I need to go to Asia. My friend is trying to get me to go to southern India next Spring...

Monday, July 14, 2014

List #1: Because we must make them!

I'm making a list of things that seem like great ideas to begin with, but are awful once you get them.

1. Hammocks
2. Pancakes
3. Bean bag chairs
4. Water beds
5. Waking up early
6. This list.

Feel free to add to this.

Saturday, July 12, 2014

The Best Inconvenient Trip

The Canada trip was awesome! Toronto is one of my new favorite cities!


Winnipeg was...cool to visit for a while.


Edmonton seems like a mini, Canadian Portland.


     Vancouver...I hear Vancouver is supposed to be great, and Stanley Park were cool, Vancouver was having a crazy day when I went. I walked out and didn't even visit any trashy areas. I walked out and there was a dude who was clearly drugged out just staring at people while waving his arms around. Then a few blocks later I saw a discarded needle in the street. Not ten minutes later a guy was screaming for some barely clothed, overweight lady, who ran across the street to chase after him. I was pretty sure she was a prostitute from the get-up, and she didn't just smell of pot but left a cloud of it behind. Then two separate duos nearly got into fights later. I hope this wasn't an every day thing for Toronto.

     The train rides are pretty wearing. Apparently, Via Rail used to have priority over freight cars, but now passenger cars give way to freight so there are frequent delays lasting hours, so if you are going to take trains in Canada don't expect them to be on time. Longer trips were delayed by 3 hours. And it's almost impossible to sleep in the uncomfortable chairs. I really lucked out by meeting some awesome people in the first train ride, but otherwise I am done with trains for a while. I would take a SNCF train in France that lasts 45 minutes, but a 30 hour Canadian one? No thanks!

     So yes, Canada is great. I will definitely have to come back for Quebec and Vancouver to see some of my newfound friends. Tomorrow, it's back to the States! AND IT'S MY BIRTHDAY! (July 13)

Is Anyone Else Ready for the Apocalypse?


Thursday, July 10, 2014

Book Release! (not mine, mostly)

The book that I helped research for Joel Kotkin has a release date!


     Joel Kotkin's new book details class in the post-Recession era. It has a unique perspective on America's new landscape. With income inequality at the same levels as during the Gilded Age, this book tracks the rise of the new over-class (techies and new financiers such as hedge fund managers and stock sharks) and the fall of the middle class into the lower class.
     Joel provided the opinions, but I busted my hump doing a ton of research from government sources, to census data, and numerous economic reports to give a clear picture of America's post-Crisis future. There are two dozen articles I helped Joel research for on the right side of this blog, so if you're curious you can read some of the issues that made it into the book and decide for yourself if you want 'The New Class Conflict.'



The Most Dangerous Ghettos I've Been To

Note! Most of these are gonna be stock photos because I wasn't going to stick around snapping photos, especially of people staring at me.

Skid Row:

Oh the infamous Skid Row. A square neighborhood in South L.A. that always has dozens of heroin addicts and homeless people just sitting around, staring at the sun. My friends and I were touring L.A. and accidentally walked into Skid Row, and instantly turned around. When we entered the ghetto there was one guy jeering at us, and thirty seconds later we left and he yelled, "Damn, deys da same people!" So apparently he had just enough drugs that morning.



Perpignan:

Perpignan is a beautiful city in the south of France...except Saint Jacques, which is where the historic Perpignan castle. Saint Jacques has also been taken over by Roma (known as Gypsies in America because that word doesn't have the same negative connotations). Believe whatever you want politically, but after I visited the castle I accidentally took a wrong turn (something that's easy to do because Perpignan is a very old city with many confusing alley-ways and turning roads) and ended up in the Roma ghetto. There is trash blanketing the ground, starving dogs wandering the alleys, and people just stand in their doors looking at you. I was definitely scared, too scared to pull out my map and show I was a tourist. But I escaped and got to the nice(r) part of the city.

Winnipeg/Edmonton
A picture outside my hotel in Edmonton's downtown.

Winnipeg and Edmonton have been frequently ranked, alongside Regina and Saskatoon, as the 'Murder Capitals' of Canada. The funny thing though is that compared to world cities, Winnipeg and Edmonton are very safe, and most of their crime is relegated to certain neighborhoods. In Edmonton's northeast downtown there is a lot of drug activity and even signs telling you to call the police if you see prostitutes, but everywhere outside that area seems incredibly safe. In Winnipeg, the north part of town is also pretty crime heavy and when I was there, there were sirens going off pretty constantly; so the main downtown area and some of the nice suburbs were safe, but you knew there was something dangerous happening elsewhere. 

Technically I've been to some other cities which rank as the 'murder capital' of their country or area, such as Washington D.C., Glasgow, my family accidentally drove through the ghettos of Cincinnati, but in all those places I never had to walk through anything super dangerous.

And yes, I realize that these cities compared to cities in the Second or even Third world trump mine heavily. Have you guys ever visited anywhere incredibly dangerous? Any ghetto stories you'd like to share?

Wednesday, July 9, 2014

Canadian Graffiti

Some more graffiti and murals I found in Edmonton, Canada. 




 Shadow of the Colossus for the win!
Celebrating the hipster district on Whyte (82nd Avenue).

Office Fantasy

I work in an office setting, and it's been my dream to one day walk around the office with my horse mug all day and see if anyone notices. Obviously I wouldn't be running laps around the place, but I would go from one work station to the next, say, "Oh man, today is a doozy of a day. Back to the ol' grind," and then walk away to my next group of co-workers, and just do that all day.

It's a small dream, but one I intend to accomplish.

Kebabs, My True Love

I miss low-class kebabs. In France there are Turkish kebab shops on practically every street that sell awesome food for 1/2 the cost of regular French food. I have visited kebab shops all the US and Canada (who call the food schwarma for some reason) but they just aren't the same. In France the kebab shops sell low-class stuff; it's basically a Turkish version of McDonalds: meat, lettuce, onion, tomato and mayonnaise, BAM! Epic sandwich. But in the US and Canada the kebab shops use a bunch of spices,and different kinds of veggies and sauces. They try to make it cuisine and so it's not nearly as good. But it's still cheap...in Edmonton I got a kebab the size of my head for $7. I love kebab shops so much, even if they are high class.


Sunday, July 6, 2014

A Book So Bad It's Inspiring



    When I was young I wanted to be an author, after I decided I wasn't going to be a fireman, movie star, superhero, president, ninja, or other kind of superhero. Well, one day I found out that a young kid around my age had written a book. The young 'wunderkind' was Christopher Paolini and his book was called Eragon. If you fell off your bike and severely damaged your head, let me point out that Eragon is just 'dragon' but with an 'E' in the place of the 'D.' I wasn't particularly interested in the book but I wanted to read something a 15 year old had written since I was about that age. So I picked up the book. I read the first page and put it down. It was written in the passive voice, the Urglucks, or whatever they were called, were clear rip-offs of orcs, and the shade creature was poorly described and derivative of ring-wraiths. I was so disgusted with the book that I decided I would not just write a novel out of nowhere. I vowed to build up my skills by writing short stories. So yes, even as a teenager I was a pretty extreme, hipstery prick.

     Despite my hatred of this work, I told myself I wasn't going to personally attack the book or the author, because I think that's mean-spirited. But yesterday I met a published author on the train from Winnipeg to Edmonton. She told me she has a son who read Eragon and had the same experience. After reading this book he was so disgusted that he decided to work up his talent and is currently in the process of writing a full-length novel. So there are at least two people who were driven from pursuing an early writing career due to the horror that is Eragon.

     Have you ever read a book so bad it made you think twice about writing? Any books make you cringe? I have quite a few that I hate with passion, but I keep most of those to myself. Wouldn't want to make enemies, you know...



Saturday, July 5, 2014

Funny Things from Around the World

More oddities I found in my travels.

 Four languages are spoken in Basel, Switzerland, so a lot of their signs are just pictures. I assume this means walking dogs is okay, but if it is why do you need a sign? And who thought putting a picture of a dog would make people understand? Why not a green circle as in 'Dog okay'? The red circle seems to imply 'No Dog.' But then maybe if they meant 'No Dog' it would be a dog with a line through it...the problems of countries with multiple languages...

Southern-style food in Malta. It was actually pretty good. Not that I ate there...

Outside a centuries' old cathedral was a giant Smurf.

Somehow needs to bring out a BBQ and see what happens.

 Tex-Mex in Malta. Why...

This piece of art in Lausanne is meant to symbolize lost limbs from land mines. Inadvertently, a lot of tourists try to jump up and touch the chair. Watching them is somewhere between painful, abominable and hilarious at the same time.


Some signs I found at a construction site in Toronto. I know, I am immature.



 Somehow I imagine that these signs get stolen a lot.



A sign I found in Basel, Switzerland. I forget why I thought it was funny, but interesting all the same.

In case of emergency become Thor. Or a a Communist. Spotted on 'The Canadian' train.

Friday, July 4, 2014

Graffiti From Around the World Part 2

Lausanne, Switzerland:


Toronto:




Winnipeg:



How did you miss!??! How can you miss graffitying a mustache on someone's face.


Unique Places Continued

I forget to add this one. South of Rancho Palos Verdes in the Greater L.A. area is a series of bunkers built in the 1930s as an anti-Japanese defense line. What's left are some sealed off ruins that look like the sort of thing used in a conspiracy movie.




Thursday, July 3, 2014

Unique Places

Once a place has a gift shop it loses its magic. It becomes a middle grade report. I hate touristy sites because on the one hand they don't have the mystery for you to be interested, or they aren't as iconic as the Eiffel Tower or places that have been so used and interpreted in culture that they have their own meanings absent their original historical significance.

There are a few places I've found that have left me thinking about them:

Malta is a fascinating country. It is a country the size of Manhattan with less than a million people, it has a dozen megalithic temples that are 6,000 years old (much older than the pyramids), it has a unique culture that is a mix of European and North African, and a Semitic language written in Latin script. All of this combined with great weather make it a major tourist site, and its economy is almost wholly based on tourism.



While most people go to Malta for its scenic beaches and history, most have overlooked that Malta is a tiny ship in the middle of a turbulent ocean known as Western capitalism. In places like Paris, London, New York and the great cities of the world that have big economies with multiple large sectors, Malta is almost entirely dependent on tourism. What this means is that while some cities in Malta have thrived and the people are prosperous, there are literally entire cities in Malta that are abandoned. High-rise apartments, shops, historic places, all left abandoned because they didn't catch on with the tourists.







When I lived in France I traveled to Avignon. It's one of the most famous cities in France because in the 1300s a series of Popes fled Rome to avoid its corruption and re-established the papacy in Avignon. A new Italian Pope declared himself in Rome and soon Europe broke out among nationalistic lines as the French rallied their allies to war against their enemies. It was a whole bloody mess and eventually the Roman popes won. Avignon became a center of mystery and a travel hotspot and to this day remains a nice and culturally significant city.

What you might not know is that there is a massive castle just a few miles north of Avignon that is almost completely abandoned. Fort St. Andre was used to overlook the river and is an incredible fortress that has stood for near a millenia, but is mostly unheard of, with not a soul walking its walls. When I went there was one person in the ticket office (which itself was a tiny room that barely managed to fit in some generic castle merchandise) and no one walking around the castle, despite it being one of the largest and best preserved I have ever been in.



While the structure remained intact, few people visited so trees and weeds have grown among the buildings in its interior.  





The houses inside the castle.

Fort St. Andre has the misfortune of not having any particular historical interest, and its just far enough away from Avignon that this mighty stone castle has faded from memory. It's hard to imagine that the people overlooking it would think it would be forgotten; the castle overlooks the entire low valley, and is itself a colossal structure.

     Mussolini wanted to turn Rome into a new center of the world. As such he built the Esposizione Universale Roma, a place filled with Fascist-style architecture: large imposing buildings, statues and murals of idealized people, and broad open spaces (as opposed to traditional, cramped European cities). What was meant to be the center of the world has become a suburb of Rome, a shopping district and night club area. Not exactly what Benito intended. Looking around at the bankers in suits and the young people heading to the discotheques while moms push their babies around in strollers pas the McDonalds, I wonder how many people know that this place was intended to be the center of all power on Earth by the Mussolini's government. 







Of all the places I've traveled, the mysterious, little-known and mostly over-looked places have been among my favorites.